Oh My God! Earthlings are Insane! - Chapter 1
Chapter 1: Returning From The Nightmare
Translator: EndlessFantasy Translation Editor: EndlessFantasy Translation
The scorching sun in the afternoon burned the ground.
Class 3-6 in Dragon City Ninth City was as stuffy and hot as a food steamer.
The students were sleepy.
The teacher brandished an alloy saber with one hand, and in the other, he held a savage looking specimen.
“Look at me!” he shouted at the top of his lungs from the podium. “Hurry up and look at me! If you don’t look, how are you supposed to know how the monsters look?”
A teenager with messy hair sitting at the back of the classroom suddenly snapped awake and screamed out.
The students and the teacher were shocked. “Meng Chao?”
There was a red sleep mark on Meng Chao’s face. His eyes were full of fear and panic, as if he had come out of a long nightmare.
He scratched his head and looked around.
When he saw the blackboard, his confused eyes suddenly focused.
Profound skills of saber techniques were densely packed on the blackboard.
There was a number pertaining the arm strength required to swing a saber, the analysis of the required torque, the speed to attack, the angle, and the depth, the highest firmness of the monster’s armor, and all sorts of other intricate and complicated formulae.
All of them showed questions that were bound to pop up during the national college examination.
There were also two lines written in big font on the blackboard.
50 DAYS UNTIL THE NATIONAL COLLEGE EXAM!
STUDY WELL, MAKE PROGRESS EVERYDAY, GIVE RAISE TO YOUR OWN GLORY, AND DOMINATE THE OTHER WORLD!
‘This is… my classroom from my third year in high school?’ Meng Chao found himself confused. ‘Aren’t I dead? Why have I returned to my third year? And I’m about to take the national college exam? That’s even worse than death!’
His head hurt so much that he felt as if it was about to split apart.
Countless memories in the form of shards rushed into his head like a fierce monster.
‘What? Dragon City fell?
‘I failed in the national college examination and was tormented by society for decades. In the end, I only managed to become a third-class fighter.
‘As for my younger sister, she had great talent and Night Demon Blood, so she became the Dark Witch. She’s one of the strongest and most fearsome fighters in Dragon City, no, all of the other world. If she were in a game, she’d be at the level of a boss.
‘So… what the heck is going on?!’
Meng Chao felt as if lightning had struck him.
He wanted to remember things carefully, but the nightmare quickly scattered from his mind, and only bits and pieces of it remained.
While he was in a daze, a familiar, large, and dark face drew close to him.
“Mr. Yan, you’re alive?” Meng Chao blurted out.
The entire class fell silent. Then, it burst into a ruckus.
Everyone admired Meng Chao’s courage to look for trouble so much that they were about to fall down and worship him.
Mr. Yan Dongxing, who taught them One Hundred Saber Techniques, was known as Demon Yan. He was a man feared by all.
It was said that in the past, he was famous as an unrelenting instructor in the army. When he killed monsters, he did it as easily as if he was mincing meat to make fillings for dumplings.
‘You actually dared to tease Demon Yan? As expected of the former strongest in Class 6. Meng Chao, we’ll organize a grand funeral for you.’
His classmates cried for him out of sympathy.
Yan Dongxing’s face had been as dark as a pan, but now, it burned red.
“Mr. Meng Chao, explain.”
He held the monster’s skull in one hand, and while his tone was calm, it was full of killing intent.
‘Oh, this is bad.’ Meng Chao’s pupils shrank.
The him right then was at least ten times more sensitive to killing intent compared to his classmates around him.
Due to the shock from the killing intent, he quickly realized what was going on around him.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Yan, I was too busy studying yesterday, so I nodded off just now and had… a nightmare?”
Meng Chao tried hard to remember the flashes in his mind and said uncertainly, “I think I dreamt of creatures residing in this foreign world coming over in droves. They were all incredibly brutal and ruthless, and they were the type to make a lot of noise. They charged to Dragon City like a tidal wave, and we couldn’t stop them at all. Our home of many years was destroyed overnight. I was shocked by it, and I woke up because of fright.
“Then, um… Mr. Yan, you were really brave in my dream. You were a martyr everyone respected. I was longing to see your smile and hear your voice in my dream, so when I opened my eyes and saw you walking over, I was overjoyed and couldn’t help but…”
“Wait.” Yan Dongxing raised his eyebrows. “You dreamt that Dragon City was destroyed and I died.”
His lips formed a smile, but he was really not smiling at all.
His grip over the monster’s skull tightened so much that it started making cracking sounds.
“Um…” Meng Chao scratched his head.
Ever since he returned from the nightmare, his will to survive became incredibly great. “Don’t worry, you died painlessly. It was a peaceful death.”
Meng Chao did not lie.
He somewhat remembered that Demon Yan was eaten by a Large Hundred Teeth Worm and was torn to shreds in just a few seconds.
He did not even have time to scream.
He should… not have felt any pain, right?
Yan Dongxing crushed the monster’s skull in his hand.
“Dragon City will be destroyed? What a joke!”
The ruthless instructor was so angry that his face turned red. His eyes went wide, which made them larger than those of a monster. “I won’t talk about you not being responsible and not cultivating, and I can’t be bothered with you sleeping during class, but Mr. Meng Chao, what exactly do you have in your head that you’d dream about Dragon City being destroyed?!
“Stand against the wall with your head up, chest out, stomach in, and ass out. Then answer me loudly. Fifty years ago, when Dragon City came to the Other World, we didn’t have coal, fuel, electricity, nor anything else. We only had plagues tormenting us and zombies rampaging the lands. At that time, did Dragon City perish?”
Meng Chao felt troubled. “Mr. Yan, how am I supposed to have my ass out if I’m to stand against the wall?”
“Sir, yes, sir! Dragon City didn’t perish!”
Meng Chao shuddered. He instantly rediscovered how he was supposed to act as a seventeen year old. He jutted his butt out and pasted a determined look on his face.
“After the disaster of the zombies, the fog arrived and monsters appeared. Countless martyrs were willing to sacrifice their lives to wrench spaces for us to live from the teeth of the monsters inch by inch.”
Yan Dongxing was shouting by this point. “During the first ten years of our fight against the monsters, we lost one-third of our population. At our darkest hour, the monsters invaded the center of our city every day. Humanity had to fight in every market, street, and toilet. Tell me, did we submit to them? Was Dragon City destroyed?”
“Sir, yes, sir! We didn’t submit to them! Dragon City was not destroyed!”
As Meng Chao faced the ruthless instructor’s saliva shower, he felt as if he was facing death with a smile.
Some of Yan Dongxing’s anger faded away, and he said darkly, “Very good. Regardless of whether it is our journey to the Other World, the rampant zombies, or the monster invasion, none of these dangers destroyed us, but made us stronger. After half a century’s worth of fighting, today, Dragon City has gained a firm foothold in this Other World.
“Compared to the time when we first transmigrated here, Dragon City has become thrice as large, and our population has increased by five times its original size. Many of our citizens have also reached the standards of the elite special forces and Olympic gold medallists on Earth. The superhumans, who are only one in a hundred, also possess astonishing fighting abilities.
“We’ve upgraded ancient martial arts, restored our great industries, and created brand new technologies. Dragon City’s armored cavaliers are all ready for battle. As soon as the fog goes away, our steel army will march forth with the momentum of tigers descending from mountains. We will spread the glory of Earth’s culture to the Other World.
“How could Dragon City, when it’s in this state, be destroyed by the creatures of this Other World? And you said they’re goddamn savage? I’m telling you, Earthlings are the ones who are the most ruthless!”
The ruthless instructor could not help but curse, and the students’ blood burned with righteous ardor as they listened to him.
The class representative, Zuo Haoran, stood up.
He had a heroic look, and he stood tall and straight. Just like his name, he gave off the air of someone who was just.
The class representative cast Meng Chao a look and said sternly, “Mr. Yan, what you said is true. We’ve lived past the age of darkness, and now, the light of victory is shining in front of us. We live in a grand era where light shines for miles, and as youngsters of the current generation, we should study well and train hard to become superhumans so that we can help Dragon City rise to power in this Other World. We should be striving to contribute our strength.
“How can we be afraid of enemies, as if they’re fearsome tigers? How can we be wondering about Dragon City’s destruction?
“Of course, I believe that there are only a few who are cowardly. Most of the students are thinking about the same thing. Dragon City will definitely win! Earth will definitely win! Civilization will definitely win!”
With the class representative in the lead, the students became excited as well.
“Dragon City will definitely win! Earth will definitely win! Civilization will definitely win!”
They swung their fists and shouted. They wanted to lay down their pens and join the army immediately so that they could sweep through the Other World.
“Class rep, you’re so handsome!”
Quite a number of girls gave Zuo Haoran admiring glances.
And in stark contrast, when they looked at Meng Chao, their gazes turned strange.
Some of them even began to whisper softly among themselves.
“Meng Chao has fallen into the slumps lately. He just keeps sleeping in class.”
“You can’t blame him for that. Something went wrong with his cultivation, and he was heavily injured. He fell from first place to last place in class. Wouldn’t you be in a slump too, if you were in his place?”
“But he shouldn’t curse Dragon City to be destroyed!”
‘The heck?! Are you trying to cause trouble?!’ Meng Chao narrowed his eyes. ‘Do you have a grudge against me?’
He thought about it carefully and realized that they really did have a grudge against each other.
The class representative Zuo Haoran was his sworn enemy during the entirety of their high school lives.
While staring at his handsome, just, and fair face, Meng Chao felt his head ache. His shattered memories surged forward, and various scenes flashed past his mind.
In them, he discovered that the class representative was related to why he flunked his national college examination in his nightmare.
After that, the class representative got himself into a famous university and quickly became a superhuman. He soared above the others.
But he was a hypocrite from top to toe.
When Dragon City was killing monsters in the Other World and obtaining victory in every battle, Zuo Haoran enjoyed a good life and was given the title of a hero. He obtained a lot of fresh flowers from admirers and plenty of glory.
When they had their high school reunion, there were seven or eight girls who flocked to him like beasts of prey.
Meng Chao was someone with a great sense of justice, so he was instantly so envious—no, he was instantly disgusted by the sight.
However, when Dragon City clashed against a true civilized race and began a difficult war against it, the class representative actually fled from battle, which made the entire battle line collapse.
Zuo Haoran was to receive his sentence in the military court, but since he had already betrayed his people once, he decided to go all out on it. He betrayed Dragon City and joined the foreign race. He sold them Earth’s secrets!
‘You’re just a traitor, why are you acting so high-and-mighty?
‘Just who is “afraid of our enemies as if they’re fearsome tigers”. At the very least, I fought until my last moments and died together with Dragon City.
‘Look at you, you first sabotaged my national college examination, then behaved like a hoodlum during our class reunions, and finally betrayed Dragon City! I’m going to kill you!’
By pure instinct, Meng Chao started going through battle plans in his head.
He took half a step forward.
Zuo Haoran was instinctively on guard against him.
“Class Rep, what you said is right! You taught me a great lesson, I’m so moved.” Meng Chao put on a sincere expression and bowed slightly. “Thank you for your guidance, Mr. Yan, Class Rep. I’ve come to a grave realization of my mistake, and I’ll change.
“From now onwards, I’ll be firm in my stance and train hard so that I can contribute to Dragon City’s rise to power in this world. I will give my full strength for it. There’s no need for me to say anything else, please just watch me!”
Zuo Haoran said nothing. He shuddered.
He felt that Meng Chao’s gaze had become strange. He was completely different from before.
“Enough. Class Rep, sit down. We’ll continue with class.”
Yan Dongxing did not waste his breath with nonsense. He gestured at the corner to Meng Chao. “You know what you need to do. Dragon Hibernation Stance. Do it until class ends.”
After the words “Dragon Hibernation Stance”, sharp inhales could be heard.
Dragon City’s compulsory education system was from kindergarten to high school, and during it they learned about the Nine Great Stances.
Three of them were lying stances, three were sitting stances, and the last three were standing stances. When combined with breathing and meditation techniques, they could absorb the spirit energy from the world and stimulate activity in the cells, allowing people to break the shackles of their genes. Then, they were able to step into the path of superhumans, and from there, evolve into sacred beings.
Dragon Hibernation Stance was the tenth stance that was not within the education syllabus. It was also the hardest stance to train.
Forget about high school, many of the majors in college did not teach Dragon Hibernation Stance.
Only the legendary “undergraduate course”, which was the sacred place to cultivate superhumans, taught Dragon Hibernation Stance.